Here's one version...

Dear Family, Friends, Civilians, and Draft Dodgers,

In the very near future the undersigned will once more be in your midst, dehydrated and demoralized, to take his place again as a human being, to enjoy the well-known forms of freedom and justice for all, and to engage in life, liberty, and the somewhat delayed pursuit of happiness. In making your joyous preparations to welcome him back into organized society, you might take certain steps to make allowances for the crude environment which has been his miserable lot for the past twelve months. In other words, he might be a little Asiatic from Vietnamesitis and overseasitis and should be handled with care. Do not be alarmed if he is infected with all forms of rare tropical diseases. A little time in the "Land of the Big PX" will cure this malady.

Therefore, show no alarm if he insists on carrying a weapon to the dinner table, looks around for his steel pot when offered a chair, or wakes you up in the middle of the night for guard duty. Keep cool when he pours gravy on his dessert or mixes peaches with his Seagram's VO. Pretend not to notice if he eats with his fingers instead of silverware and prefers C-rations to steak. Take it with a smile when he insists on digging up the garden to fill sandbags for the bunker he is building. Be tolerant when he takes his blanket off the bed and leaves the sheet and puts it on the floor to sleep on.

Abstain from saying anything about powdered eggs, dehydrated potatoes, fried rice, fresh milk, or ice cream. Do not be alarmed if he should jump up from the dinner table and rush to the garbage can to wash his dish with a toilet brush. After all, this has been his standard. Also, if it should start to rain, pay no attention to him if he pulls off his clothes, grabs a towel and a bar of soap, and runs outdoors for a shower.

When in his daily conversation he utters such things as "Xin loi" and "Choi oi", just be patient. Simply leave quickly and calmly if by some chance he utters "Di di" with an irritated look on his face, because it means no less than "Get the h___ out of here!" Do not let it shake you if he picks up the phone and yells, "Reliable, sir," or says, "Roger out," for good-by, or simply shouts, "Working!"

Never ask why the Jones's son held a higher rank than he did and by no means mention the term "extend". Pretend not to notice if at a restaurant he calls the waitress "numbah one girl" and uses his hat for an ashtray. He will probably keep listening for "Homeward Bound" to sound off over AFVN; if he does, comfort him, for he is still reminiscing. Be watchful when he is in the presence of a woman--especially a beautiful one.

Above all, keep in mind that beneath that tanned and rugged exterior there is a heart of gold-the only thing of value he has left. Treat him with kindness, tolerance, and to an occasional fifth of good liquor and you will be able to rehabilitate that which once was and now is the hollow shell of the happy-go-lucky guy you once knew and loved.

Last, but by no means least, send no more mail to the APO, fill the refrigerator with beer, get the civvies out of mothballs, fill the car with gas, and get the women and children off the streets…………………………………………………..

BECAUSE THE KID IS COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________
Signature

Homecoming letter

This is the one I sent.

Coming home letter

Here is the one I sent:

Encl:(l) Things to do and expect
l. _______________, having completed a tour of duty in
the Far East has been permitted to return to the United States for rehabilitation. Just keep in mind that your Marine in all probability has been subjected to sever psychological traumas.
You should consider it your solemn duty to assist in his rehabilitation in every possible way. Aside from the most obvious measures of bestowing affection in inordinate quantities there are certain other measures that can be taken to facilitate readjustment and prevent relapse of ASIATICUS FANATIOUS.

2.Very soon the above named person will be in your midst. De-AMERICANIZED, demoralized, and dehydrated; ready once again
to take his place as a human being with the freedom and justice for all, engaging in life, liberty, and a somewhat delayed pursuit of happiness.

3.To assist you in your efforts, Enclosure (I) is forwarded

HEADQUARTERS

Marine Aircraft Group - 16
1st Marine Aircraft Wing
Fleet Marine Force, Pacific
FPO, San Francisco, 6alifornia 96602
_From: Senior Medical Officer

Ref: (a) BUMED INST 4J23.IB
Subj: Return for rehabilitation, case of

I. M. SHORT, Commanding

1. Unusual behavior may be as follows:
a. Scorning civilized dress and walking-around semi-nude
or nude.
b .Maintaining a thousand foot stare in a ten foot room.
c. Referring to an air mattress as a "rubber lady".
d. Insisting on building a machinegun bunker in the front yard. e. He will at all times walk around fully armed. and encourage
others to do the same.
f. He will seem extremely uncivilized at the dinner table.
(to limit his profanity at the dinner table, place
everything in front of him---salt, bread, sugar, ect.)
2. In making your joyous preparations to welcome him home,
and into a respectable society, you must make allowances for the crude environment in which he has suffered in the last 12 months. In a word, he may be somewhat Asiatic; suffering from various stages of Viet-Congitis, and too much. "KOOL AID".
3. Therefore, show no alarm if he prefers to squat rather than sit in a chair, pads around thong sandal's and towel, slyly offers to sell cigarettes to the postman and licks at food suspiciously, as if you were trying to poison him. Don’t be surprised if he answers all questions with "I hate this place" or "NUMBER ONE"... .Be tolerant when he tries to buy everything at less than half the asking price, accuses the grocer of being a thief, and refuses to enter an establishment that doesn't have steel mesh screens over the doors and windows. Due to the unsanitary water conditions in the Far East, this poor, unfortunate has been FORCED to drink such things as GIN, VODKA, BOURBON, RUM, WHISKEY, . WINE, BEER, and local native brews. Don't be surprised if he gives all drinks that are served in public places the "acid test" and strains them for broken glass.

4. For the first few months (until he is house broken) he especially watchful when he is in the company of women; PARTICULARY YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL SPECIMENS. The few American girls he may have seen since arriving overseas were I3 years old or married to personnel who outrank him; his first reaction upon meeting an attractive "round eye" may be to stare.
Wives, Sweethearts, and Parents are advised to take advantage of this momentary shock and move the young lady out of his REACH.
5. All the following sights should be avoided as they may
produce advanced stages of shock: people dancing, te1evision,
and round eyed women. In a relatively short time, his profanity will decrease enough to permit him to associate with mixed groups, and soon he will speak English as well as he ever did. He may also complain of sleeping in a room and refuse to go to bed without a mosquito net.

6. Below are 1isted some DO’s and DON'TS:
a. Don't mention anything about going to the beach.
b. Don't mention anything about going on an overnight
camping trip!
c. Don't make any flattering remarks about the exotic Southeast Asia, and avoid mentioning the benefits of overseas duty, such as seasonal weather, (typhoons, sand storms, monsoons, etc.) lavish beaches, and beautiful "Resort" areas such as PHU BAI, DA NANG,CHU QUANG NHOW,AND CAM RANH BAY.
d. Don't under any circumstances question your Marine
about his visits and deployment to duty areas
and R&R such as Japan, Korea, Okinawa,
Phi11ipines, Bangkok, and Hong Kong, as these will go unanswered _except for a sly smile and an animalistic howl.
e.Give him an abundance of love.
f. Show him where the household shower is located and
how to operate it. Imagine what your neighbors
will think if they see YOUR Marine naked,
with a towel over his shoulder and a bar of soap
in one hand, going down the street looking for the outdoor portable shower unit that he has come to know
so well. It can be hard to explain to the local
police. '
g. Do, by all means, inform all relatives, friends and neighbors to stay away from the premises for at least
48 hours. This is the DANGER PERIOD****We have absolutely no idea as to what he will do. Remember, this is a battle scarred Marine, anything can happen.
h. Hire the best lawyer in town. You just may need him.
i. If you intend to meet your husband/ sweetheart/ son upon his arrival at the airport near you, we high1y recommend that you br1ng enough money to pay for damaged property at the airport, and to pay for offenses such as slander, pub1ic drunkenness, some stunts he may try to pull off which were legal in the Far East
7. Keep in mind that beneath his tanned rugged exterior there
beats a heart of pure gold. Treasure this for it is the
only thing of value he has left, even though he has tried
to pawn it on several occasions. Treat him with kindness, give him an occasional quart of who1e milk and you will be able to rehabilitate this ho11ow shell of-the man you knew.

8. SEND NO MORE LETTERS TO FPO 96602 AFTER 16, Jan. FOR HE IS LEAVING THE TROPICS IN 2 DAYS AND HEADING FOR THE
LAND OF THE BIG PX. _.
9. FILL THE ICEBOX WITH BEER. THE "KID" IS COMING HOME.

Here's another version

Here's a copy of another letter home.